We asked singers (anonymously) from all different walks of life and exposure to substance use and abuse to share their experiences with us. Their candor and honesty with personal—and sometimes painful—details of their lives were truly remarkable, and revealed a deep commitment to helping others who might have lost their way. As one singer said poignantly: “Alas, while music gives life, the abuse of our bodies only takes it away.”
There are no judgments to be made here, no lectures or labels. It is simply a chance for these voices to be heard, to understand something of the shadowy universe of substance abuse, and see if any of it applies to ourselves.
The very nature of substance abuse thrives on secrets, denial, and lies, so exposing it to the light can only move us forward. As one respondent so aptly put it, “Alcoholism is the only disease which convinces you that you’re fine and everything else is to blame.”
The singers who responded to our questionnaire provided powerful insights into determining when everything is not all right, and where to go from there. Many singers pointed out that however serious your own substance-abuse problem might be, you are not alone, and it is absolutely possible to get yourself and your life back on track.
First, to put substance abuse into perspective for singers, it’s helpful to see how alcohol, cigarette smoke, and recreational drugs affect the vocal instrument.
Alcohol
Two major effects of alcohol are dehydration and depression. The drying effects on the vocal apparatus, combined with the increased thickness and quantity of mucous, are hard on the voice. A poorly hydrated larynx is more susceptible to illness and vocal strain, and the mucous membranes tend to swell.
The effects of depression are deep and far-reaching, but in general depression drags down a person’s sense of self-esteem and motivation, which has a negative influence on his or her career.
Alcohol irritates the mucous membranes of the gastrointestinal tract, causing increased mucous secretion, an increase in stomach acid secretion, delayed gastric emptying, and an increase in gastroesophageal reflux. Or, to skip all the medical jargon, alcohol irritates your stomach and increases the amount of corrosive stomach juices that back up into the throat. Long-term use can lead to increased vascularization (too many blood vessels), a drop in fundamental frequency, and hoarseness.
Alcohol’s effect as a muscle relaxant may impair the sensitivity of the throat and the fine motor control of the vocal cords, which are, of course, muscles.
Most singers know how important it is to be well rested for optimal performance, for respiratory, muscular, and emotional stamina. Alcohol causes shallow sleep patterns and aggravates sleep disorders, resulting in singers who are tired when they wake up.
Cigarettes
Even one cigarette can affect vocal performance. Smoking reddens and inflames the respiratory system, the hard palate, the soft palate, and the uvula, as well as the laryngeal structures and the vocal cords themselves. With extended use of cigarettes, the voice ultimately loses its brilliance and cutting edge.
Secondhand smoke also is bad for singers. It includes more than 4,000 chemicals (50 of them carcinogenic), including ammonia, carbon monoxide, formaldehyde, and benzene. Alcohol and tobacco interact to increase the risk of developing cancer of the larynx.
Smoking reduces normal breathing capacity via chronic bronchial constriction, and increases the risk of polyp formation and degenerative disease of the vocal cords, and the constant irritation prevents vocal nodules from healing.
Recreational Drugs
Marijuana and cocaine have a drying effect on the mucous membranes (and hence on the vocal cords). Marijuana smoke causes even greater irritation to the throat than cigarette smoke. The sensory alterations it causes may affect intellectual awareness and fine motor control, all of which have a negative impact on physical and emotional performance.
Cocaine can cause chemical and thermal burns of the vocal tract, leading to harshness and breathiness of the voice, as well as loss of clarity and high range. Uppers can cause tremors in the voice, and Ecstasy can tighten the jaw.
The Questionnaire
Besides the physical and health impacts of these substances, the effects on personality, performance and career can be devastating. The singers themselves can tell you their own stories:
1: Have alcohol or drugs adversely affected your career as a singer?
“Alcohol abuse has seriously hindered my career as a singer … dehydration may have caused some very serious vocal difficulties, but most of the damage is psychological and spiritual.”
“Drugs trashed my voice. Coupled with an extreme weight loss, [drugs] made it impossible to sing.”
“I never managed the level of success I really wanted. Drugs and alcohol stifled my motivation, hindered my self-esteem, and diminished my self-worth to a point where I didn’t feel I deserved a career, or to even be around successful people. All the while my disease [substance abuse] was telling me that everything was OK.”
“Emotional development was stunted, which precludes making mature work of a role.”
“It has thwarted my commitment to practice, and has diminished my morale.”
2: When did you become aware that drinking/substance abuse was negatively affecting your personal and/or professional life, and how did this happen?
“I kept getting fired from teaching jobs! … I’ll never forget what my son said to me one day: ‘Daddy, you only act like this when you’re drunk.’”
“During my senior year in college, I had dropped over 60 pounds, and the only thing keeping me going was ‘speed.’”
“When I got into rehab is when I began to realize what I was missing. Before then, I never considered the effects the drink and drugs were having, professionally. I know that sounds naive, but it’s true.”
3: How long have you been in Alcoholics Anonymous, or other counseling organizations, and has it been helpful in your recovery?
Answers ranged from no time to 19 years.
“Sixteen years clean and sober. It’s been more than helpful. It changed my life and gave me a support system that has been invaluable.”
“I always thought if I had will I could accomplish anything, so I did it on my own.”
“Two years. It has been moderately helpful. Ultimately one must help oneself.”
4. What advice would you give to singers who drink or use drugs?
“If you are serious about a career as a singer, you have to choose one or the other. There is no compromise.”
“No matter how good or bad your career is, it will [be] much better in the long run for you to stop abusing alcohol or drugs. You know who you are.”
“Anything that stands between you and your family, your self-respect, whatever means anything to you, is not worth keeping around.”
“Don’t do it!”
“Recognize that it is self-destructive and run for help!”
“Once a habit has a firm grip on your life, change can be very difficult.”
“Besides AA, there are tons of wonderful programs and techniques that have helped many people to recover from alcoholism and substance abuse … like hypnotherapy, for instance.”
“Most of us think we don’t have a problem.”
5: How has drinking/substance abuse affected your motivation in singing and promoting your career?
“It made it impossible. I never wanted to do anything. I always felt people were judging me, and that made me reluctant to do anything.”
“Today, it takes a lot to motivate me. I am stuck out here … where there are very few paying singing opportunities.”
“It removed it. The worst part of it was that I couldn’t see it. I always blamed it on everything but the booze and the pot.”
6: How has it affected your personal relationships, and has this affected your career?”
“Alcohol can cause problems in a social setting. … Word spreads fast in this small singer’s world, and casting directors have sensitive ears.”
“I don’t have many boundaries, and have problems saying no. Consequently, I allow all kinds of inappropriate and abusive behavior. Stage directors and conductors frequently act in abusive ways and I allow it without saying anything.”
“Marital relationships are also a problem, and that certainly has had a bad effect on my career as a singer.”
“I have isolated myself, cutting myself off from possible channels of support, both personally and professionally.”
7: How has it affected your physical condition, and has this affected your career?
“I was not able to make it through a phrase without breathing.”
“I have often imagined the health and physique I would have if I did not abuse my body at all.”
“It affects breath control, hydration, and dexterity.”
8: How has it affected your self-esteem, and has this affected your career?
“Direct hit. How can a person in such an exposed profession expect to function with the lack of self-esteem predominate in alcoholics?”
“I was looking for approval and failed to see that music is a tool for inspiring others. I have had to change my attitude toward music making [after becoming sober] in order to give real meaning to the profession.”
9: How has it affected your professional image, and has this affected your career?
“It isn’t about ‘what people think,’ it’s about how it personally affects you as a person. If you are a smoker (like me), are you really being your authentic self?”
“Many people don’t know about it. I managed to keep quiet about it.”
“The missed opportunities along the way. I can’t think about it without great regret.”
10: What would you like other singers to know about your personal journey through alcoholism or substance abuse?
“The most useful exercise I’ve done is simply to examine my life and to ask: ‘Is this how I want it to be?’ And to acknowledge that I am the only person responsible for changing it.”
“I had a low self-esteem, and it turned into a vicious self-hate cycle. It is almost impossible to focus on a singing career in these conditions.”
“Therapy, therapy and therapy. I can’t stress enough how this has helped me.”
“There is such a terrible price to pay for such a stupid reason. Just don’t get started!”
“Never hesitate in taking that first step. … I don’t remember much of those four years, but I’m making up for it now.”
“We alcoholics are the last people to ask for help. … Get your butt to an AA meeting. Follow the instructions posted on the wall. If you do them to the best of your ability, you will have a new life full of freedom.”
“Every drunk negatively affects more than 60 people. … Alcohol/drugs added to anyone with ambition equals disaster.”
Some respondents who wrote in do not have a substance abuse problem. Here are some of their comments:
“I have found a very potent healing agent that I want to pass on: the use of an amino acid supplementation that balances brain chemistry so the person no longer craves outside substances as relief from the internal and external pressures of life. The source is a book by Julia Ross called The Mood Cure.”
“There are natural products that cleanse the liver, which aids in [decreasing] the physical desire for the substance.”
“Usually the abuse of chemical substances reflects a problem in one’s psychological outlook on life. This [and the substance abuse] … eventually affects the voice, the relationships with other colleagues, and one’s ability to memorize music and create truly beautiful, artistic music. The mind, spirit and body must be free, pure and ready to express the content of the art form.”
“Fortunately, I do not have a substance abuse problem. However, I want to let you know how important I think this survey is. Thank you for doing this. I am sure it will be helpful for singers with the alcoholic disease to feel support and understanding from the Classical Singer community.”
And this, in the end, is what this survey has been all about. If you do not have any problems with substance abuse, bravo. If you recognize yourself in any of the comments shared by the respondents, perhaps this will be a first step out of the shadows.
