I can't play tennis 
My golf's a menace 
I just can't do the Australian crawl 
And I'm no better at volleyball 
Ain't there anyone here for love, sweet love 
Ain't there anyone here for love 


I'm apathetic and non-athletic 
Can't keep up in a marathon 
I need some shoulder to lean upon 
And a couple of arms to hold me 
Ain't there anyone here for love 


I'm not in condition to wrestle 
I've never trained in a gym 
Show me a man who can nestle 
And I'll pin a medal on him 


Need some chappy 
To make me happy 
And he don't have to be Hercules 
Don't anyone know about birds and bees 
Ain't there anyone here for love, sweet love 
Ain't there anyone here for love 


(JANE - Spoken): 
(Doubles, anyone?) 
(Court's free) 
(Two out of three) 
(Anyone?) 
(Doesn't anyone wanna play?) 


I like big muscles 
And red corpuscles 
I like a beautiful hunk o' man 
But I'm no physical culture fan
Ain't there anyone here for love, sweet love  
Ain't there anyone, ain't there anyone 
Ain't there anyone, anyone, anyone, anyone 
For love